letter to disability for mom

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letter to disability for mom

Post by Archived Topic » Wed Dec 26, 2001 4:37 am

January 17, 2003

Dear Friend,

Hello, my name is Amy and I'm writing this letter in hopes of possibly giving you some information that will help you to make a favorable decision for my mother, Renee Vlasuk. First I would like to tell you a little about myself. I am 32 years old; I have been married for 11 years to my husband Jeff, and have three beautiful boys Taylor 10, Seth 7, and Joshua 3. I work full time for a local wholesale club where I am currently the Personnel manager.

My parents have been married for almost 35 years, and they are the most wonderful people anyone could ever hope to have for role models. They have been caring and involved in my brother and my lives, but have also let us make, and learn from, our own mistakes. They come from good families where they were taught that if you work hard, then you would earn what you deserve.

My mother is a vibrant woman. She genuinely cares about the people in her life and she has many friends, because you just can’t help but to like her. She will be honest with you, even if what she has to say is not what you want to hear.

Over the years I have watched my mother suffer with constant back pain. I have lost count of how many hospitalizations; surgeries and procedures have been done to try to alleviate her pain. I see her wake up every day in pain, and go to bed every night with pain. There is not a day that goes by that my mother does not suffer, but you will never hear her complain.

Our family recently took a trip to Disney world. My father wanted all of us to be able to go together. My parents, my husband, myself, our three children, and my brother and his fiancee. When we were younger, we would get up at the crack of dawn and go all day. This time we slept late, and took our time getting ready to allow my mother the time she needed just to be able to get out of bed. We leisurely strolled through the parks while my mother sat in a wheelchair. Midday my mother would have to go back to the hotel, to lie down. She cannot sit for very long, stand for very long or walk a great distance without her back becoming more painful. She didn't get to do all the things she wanted to do, or see all the things the rest of us saw.

My mother does not want to be disabled. She would like very much to be able to work, or at least to be able to get through one day without so much pain. I wish that there was more I could do for her than just write this letter.


*** i dont know what else to say!!! please help!!!
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letter to disability for mom

Post by Archived Reply » Wed Dec 26, 2001 4:51 am

Having helped a number of fellow arthritis sufferers apply for disability, I can offer you a few tips. Letters from physicians count a lot more than letters from family or friends, so you might want to check with her primary physician if s/he thinks that your contribution will help or hinder.

Emotional displays, personal information about yourself, and declarations of how wonderful your mom and dad are, are all totally out of place in a letter like this. The folks making the decision, whether it is for a private insurer or a government disability/pension plan, want facts, not emotional appeals. You and I know that this is an emotional issue for you and for her, since she is bound to be frustrated, clinically depressed and angry at her limitations, and you are sad to see her diminished from the vibrant person she was. But, that's irrelevant to the decision maker - if it was relevant, only nice people would be able to get disability! *grin*

Don't tell them about how your mom couldn't enjoy her Disneyland vacation. As far as the insurer is concerned, if she's disabled, she shouldn't be able to go on a vacation that is usually considered to be an active type. Heck, I wouldn't be able to do Disneyland without a wheelchair, and I refuse to file for disability!

What they need to see are facts. Does it take your mom 2 hours to dress in the morning? Can she no longer do housework without assistance? Is she unable to remain in one position (i.e. sitting or standing) for more than an hour without pain?

Try something like this, perhaps:

Dear Insurer:

I am writing on behalf of my mother, Mrs. Nice Lady. Her physician has sent the requisite forms with her application, but I wanted to provide some information on the impact of her medical condition on her ability to work.

Since her first back surgery in 1987, her condition has deteriorated significantly. Subsequent surgeries, sessions of physiotherapy and daily medication have not alleviated her condition sufficiently to allow her to return to work. Several attempts have been made, but all were curtailed by a return of her symptoms, and indeed, the symptoms were exacerbated by her return to work.

Because of the constant pain, it now takes my mother two hours to bathe and dress each day. She is unable to sit or stand for more than 15 minutes without pain, and the atrophy in her back muscles prevents her from lifting more than a few pounds or turning more than a few degrees. She requires the use of a wheelchair for any outings that last more than 10 minutes.

As her physician has attested, these severe limitations make it virtually impossible for my mother to obtain and hold gainful employment, either in her previous occupation as a Rabbit Hutch Builder, or in any other type of employment.

Should you need any further information on the impact of my mother's disability, please do not hesitate to contact me.


Ms. Thoughtful Daughter

I'm sure you'll want to adjust the phrasing to suit your own style, but I thought I should share with you my own experience in helping other people with disability apps.

Jules/Vancouver BC garden_goddess @ hotmail.com
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