50 Shades of Grey

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50 Shades of Grey

Post by Wizard of Oz » Mon Feb 16, 2015 4:15 am

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY

BY PAM AYRES

The missus bought a Paperback,
down Shepton Mallet way,
I had a look inside her bag;...
T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey".
Well I just left her to it,
And at ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread.
In her left hand she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.
Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Mabel hasn't weathered well;
She's eighty four next week!!
Watching Mabel bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
And things then went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!
She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and said
"I am a dominator!!"
Now if you knew our Mabel,
You'd see just why I spluttered,
I'd spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I'd uttered.
She stood there nude and naked
Bent forward just a bit
I went to hold her, sensual like
and stood on her left tit!
Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out;
My God what had I done!
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
"Step on the other one!!"
Well readers, I can tell no more;
Of what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my jet black hair,
Turned fifty shades of grey!!

WoZ going to the bookshop
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Signature: "The question is," said Alice, "whether you can make words mean so many different things."

Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Post by Bobinwales » Tue Feb 17, 2015 4:03 pm

Shame. It isn't Pam Ayres after all, according to The Guardian.
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Signature: All those years gone to waist!
Bob in Wales

Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Post by Wizard of Oz » Wed Feb 18, 2015 1:27 am

.. well fancy that .. it is so like her style of writing that I did not even question it .. it's still bloody funny ..

WoZ with the whip
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Signature: "The question is," said Alice, "whether you can make words mean so many different things."

Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Post by Plastic » Mon Feb 23, 2015 3:21 pm

I readed it and it's great, I love this style:D
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Re: 50 Shades of Grey

Post by tony h » Tue Feb 24, 2015 12:37 am

Plastic wrote:I readed it and it's great, I love this style:D
I read it and it's great
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Signature: tony

With the right context almost anything can sound appropriate.

End of topic.
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