The old Travelling Salesman joke.

We've created this area in the hope of seeing material ranging from some well-told (or well retold) jokes to original writing with a humorous slant, or anything else that might appeal to the kind of person who enjoys playing with words more than people. That probably means someone like yourself. N.B. -- Postings preceded by ** contain some sexual or risqué content. (Makes them easier to find.)
Post Reply

The old Travelling Salesman joke.

Post by Wizard of Oz » Sun Apr 05, 2015 4:04 am

Two traveling salesmen were riding together across West Texas when their car began to sputter and cough. Soon, it died completely and they were stranded on the side of a state highway with little traffic.
Fortunately, a pick up truck pulled over to help. The driver was a comely middle aged woman in jeans and a work shirt. She told them the closest town with a mechanic was 60 miles away, and since it was past 5:00 pm they would be closed anyway until the next day.
In a gesture of Texas hospitality, she invited them to stay the night at her ranch which was nearby. Then they could call the garage in town to get their car fixed in the morning.
The two salesmen were very appreciative, and climbed into the pickup with her.
Soon they turned into a gate, and began driving through a lovely farm where cattle were grazing behind neatly built fences. As they drove she told them how she and her late husband had run this farm for years before he had died from a heart attack two years ago. Now it was just her running things, and it got lonely out here so she was glad for the chance to have guests.
Before long they pulled up to a very nice ranch house surrounded by a white fence and with a big barn nearby.
Once inside, the widow rancher made them comfortable on the big front porch and brought them cold iced tea before proceeding inside to cook a delicious home cooked meal for them. After dinner they chatted in the living room for a few hours before she showed them to the guest bedroom where they found a comfortable bed with down pillows and a homemade quilt.
In the morning the widow made them an enormous breakfast while they waited for the tow truck to come collect their car.
When the wrecker came, they bid the kind widow a fond farewell and she sent them on their way with a bag of cookies for later.
Soon their car was repaired and they were on their way again.
About nine months had passed when one of the salesman called the other.
"Bob, do you remember about nine months ago when our car broke down in West Texas?"
"Yes, Ted. I remember that."
"And Bob, do you remember that very kindly widow that took us in for the night?"
"Well of course I remember her Ted."
"Well Bob, I have to ask you something."
"Ok Ted."
"Bob, did you slip out of the guest room that night?"
Yes Ted, I did."
"And Bob, did you go to the widow's room that night?"
"I did Ted."
"Did you and the widow make love Bob?"
"Yes, we did Ted"
"Now Bob, this is very important. Did you by chance use MY name that night when you slept with her?"
"I did Ted. I'm ashamed of myself, but I did. I'm really, really sorry Ted...."
"Oh, that's ok Bob. I just wanted to call and let you know that she died and left me the ranch in her will."
Signature: "The question is," said Alice, "whether you can make words mean so many different things."

Re: The old Travelling Salesman joke.

Post by Phil White » Sun Apr 05, 2015 3:09 pm

It may be old, but I hadn't heard it. Made me chuckle.

I came across this classic a few days ago, but since nobody can do it like Clement Freud, here is a link:
Signature: Phil White
Non sum felix lepus

Post Reply