Writing tips

We've created this area in the hope of seeing material ranging from some well-told (or well retold) jokes to original writing with a humorous slant, or anything else that might appeal to the kind of person who enjoys playing with words more than people. That probably means someone like yourself. N.B. -- Postings preceded by ** contain some sexual or risqué content. (Makes them easier to find.)
Post Reply

Writing tips

Post by Berale » Sat Mar 22, 2008 2:08 am

HOW TO WRITE GOOD

1. Avoid alliteration. Always.
2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
3. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)
4. Employ the vernacular.
5. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
6. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
7. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
8. Contractions aren't necessary.
9. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
10. One should never generalize.
11. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
12. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
13. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
14. Be more or less specific.
15. Understatement is always best.
16. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
17. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
18. The passive voice is to be avoided.
19. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
20. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
21. Who needs rhetorical questions?
22. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS
Signature: Meirav
http://meirav.multiply.com

Re: Writing tips

Post by Erik_Kowal » Sat Mar 22, 2008 11:54 am

23. A correlative conjunction can either be used correctly nor it can't.
24. "Two positive elements cannot combine in negation." Yeah, right.
25. Onomatopoeic words are the preserve of linguistic cuckoos.
26. One should make sure you always keep the subject pronoun consistent.
27. No word is inherently funny: so much for kumquats.
28. As Jane Austen noted in 1984, misattribution is one of the cardinal sins of literature.
29. Elliptical constructions: no can do.
30. And starting a sentence with a conjunction is definitely wrong.
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS
Signature: -- Looking up a word? Try OneLook's metadictionary (--> definitions) and reverse dictionary (--> terms based on your definitions)8-- Contribute favourite diary entries, quotations and more here8 -- Find new postings easily with Active Topics8-- Want to research a word? Get essential tips from experienced researcher Ken Greenwald

Re: Writing tips

Post by dalehileman » Fri Mar 28, 2008 3:45 pm

In order to avoid superfluous verbiage, me, I believe that such an expression, "It's my opinion that...", "I believe that...", etc, is unnecessary because it's my opinion that it goes without saying that if you didn't believe it I think you wouldn't say it
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS

Re: Writing tips

Post by gdwdwrkr » Fri Mar 28, 2008 4:02 pm

And boy are those tip's dumb.
Some of them definately break there own rules!
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS

Re: Writing tips

Post by Erik_Kowal » Sat Apr 21, 2012 8:20 am

31. Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do.
32. Don't never use a double negative.
33. Do not make statements in the negative form.
34. Proofread carefully to see if you words out.
35. If you reread your work, you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.
36. A writer must not shift your point of view.
37. Don't overuse exclamation marks!!
38. Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences (such as those of 10 or more words), to their antecedents.
39. Writing carefully, dangling participles can be avoided.
40. If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
41. Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors.
42. Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
43. Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.
44. It is important to assure you pick on the correct idiom.
45. The adverb always follows the verb.
46. Avoid writing a run-on sentence, you need to punctuate it as two.
47. Be carefully to use adjectives and adverbs correct.
48. About sentence fragments.
49. Each pronoun must agree with their antecedent.
50. Just between you and I, case is important.
51. Join clauses good, like a conjunction should.
52. Don't use commas, that aren't necessary.
53. Its important to use apostrophe's correctly.
54. Only Proper Nouns should be capitalized. also a sentence should begin with a capital and end with a period
55. Use hyphens in compound-words, not just in any two word phrase.
56. In letters compositions reports and things like that we use commas to keep a string of items apart.
57. Watch out for irregular verbs which have creeped into our language.
58. Verbs has to agree with their subjects.
59. Profanity in writing sucks.
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS
Signature: -- Looking up a word? Try OneLook's metadictionary (--> definitions) and reverse dictionary (--> terms based on your definitions)8-- Contribute favourite diary entries, quotations and more here8 -- Find new postings easily with Active Topics8-- Want to research a word? Get essential tips from experienced researcher Ken Greenwald

Re: Writing tips

Post by Edwin F Ashworth » Sat Apr 21, 2012 9:55 am

60. Obey whomever wrote: "When counteraction occurs due to apocopation, the relative pronoun stays loyal to the relative clause."
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS

Re: Writing tips

Post by Edwin F Ashworth » Tue Apr 24, 2012 8:30 am

934 875. Keep rules to a workable minimum.
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS

Re: Writing tips

Post by occam » Sun May 20, 2012 11:59 pm

I appreciate all these rules but since I have no relative clause, #60 is not my cuppa tea.
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS

Re: Writing tips

Post by Erik_Kowal » Mon May 21, 2012 1:44 am

Pace Edwin, Occam, I think you have a valid point.

Perhaps you might care to suggest an alternative rule in its place. (Do feel free to label it "60. (subst.)", however awkward-looking that may look.)
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS

Re: Writing tips

Post by hsargent » Mon May 21, 2012 2:30 pm

I thought it was "How to write well".
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS
Signature: Harry Sargent

Re: Writing tips

Post by elview » Wed Jul 11, 2012 5:12 am

53. Its important to use apostrophe's correctly.
Regarding #53, in the last fifteen years or so people in the US have totally forgotten how to use an apostrophe. I see apostrophes everywhere: in e-mails, signs, letters, even newspapers!!!!! They are all being used with plurals. Yes, I know I just broke another rule back there. I did it purposely because a newspaper should be better edited than to have such errors.

What has caused this mass amnesia?

Is it happening in other countries or is it just here?

elview, who knows better than to write egg's, biscuit's, or tail's.
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS
Signature: elview
"You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life." ~ Winston Churchill

Re: Writing tips

Post by Wizard of Oz » Wed Jul 11, 2012 11:53 am

.. el if you search for apostrophe in WW (function in the top right corner) you will find several spirited discussions ..

WoZ who'se un'decid'ed
ACCESS_POST_ACTIONS
Signature: "The question is," said Alice, "whether you can make words mean so many different things."

ACCESS_END_OF_TOPIC
Post Reply