steak sauce contents

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steak sauce contents

Post by Ken Greenwald » Thu Feb 23, 2012 8:16 pm

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While having an important luncheon meeting at a upscale restaurant, with lousy food, the protagonist’s mind wanders and he speculates on the contents of a bottle of steak sauce sitting on the table.
<2000 “If the manifest of ingredients on the bottle had been legible, it would have read something like this: Water, blackstrap molasses, habanero peppers, salt, garlic, ginger, tomato puree, axle grease, real hickory smoke, snuff, butts of clove cigarettes, Guinness Stout fermentation dregs, uranium mill tailings, muffler cores, monosodium glutamate, nitrates, nitrites, nitrotes and nitrutes, nutrites, natrotes, powdered pork nose hairs, dynamite, activated charcoal, matchheads, used pipe cleaners, tar, nicotine, single-malt whiskey, smoked beef lymph nodes, autumn leaves, red fuming nitric acid, bituminous coal, fallout, printer’s ink, laundry starch, drain cleaner, blue chrysotile asbestos, carrageenan, BHA, BHT, and natural flavorings.”—Diamond Age by Neal Stephenson, page 193>
When I read those last three words, I almost split a gut!
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Ken G – February 23, 2012
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