Search found 8014 matches

by Erik_Kowal
Wed Jul 20, 2005 4:41 am
Forum: No, wait. Don't tell me
Topic: Coming home to roost
Replies: 0
Views: 2186

Coming home to roost

The state elections were approaching. A chartered bus decorated with party slogans was filled with politicians en route to a public meeting. However, it was running behind schedule, and was travelling along a rural Arkansas road at some speed. As bad luck would have it, the driver of the bus misjudg...
by Erik_Kowal
Tue Jul 19, 2005 1:30 am
Forum: No, wait. Don't tell me
Topic: Getting to first base
Replies: 0
Views: 2288

Getting to first base

"I've seen plenty of batting slumps," the baseball team manager remarked to one of his coaches, "but I've never had a whole line-up in a slump before." The team had lost ten of its last twenty games, scoring only eight runs during that whole stretch. The best they'd done was four hits in a game. "We...
by Erik_Kowal
Mon Jul 18, 2005 9:58 pm
Forum: Word Origins and Meanings
Topic: Peek-a-boo shutters
Replies: 7
Views: 1713

Peek-a-boo shutters

I believe that you believe that, Hans. ;-)
by Erik_Kowal
Mon Jul 18, 2005 7:57 pm
Forum: Word Origins and Meanings
Topic: Peek-a-boo shutters
Replies: 7
Views: 1713

Peek-a-boo shutters

Just keep ignoring the typos made by Hans Joerg's 'better half'.
by Erik_Kowal
Mon Jul 18, 2005 6:47 pm
Forum: Addicts' Corner
Topic: Floccinaucinihilipilification
Replies: 5
Views: 3635

Floccinaucinihilipilification

It was a deliberate twist on the original word. But it was certainly worth you asking.
by Erik_Kowal
Mon Jul 18, 2005 6:27 pm
Forum: Miscellaneous
Topic: When is a word labelled 'bad'?
Replies: 13
Views: 5468

When is a word labelled 'bad'?

I agree with Phil. To pissist persist would be a urinous ruinous exercise. On the other hand, who could disagree that Che's neologisms (not to mention his notions overall) are a wonderful innovation in humour, especially the splendid 'Philpsilosophy' coinage? (I wonder if that's anything like Hugh H...
by Erik_Kowal
Sun Jul 17, 2005 11:31 pm
Forum: No, wait. Don't tell me
Topic: An unsuitable choice
Replies: 0
Views: 2509

An unsuitable choice

When the store manager returned from lunch, he immediately noticed that the hand of his checkout clerk was bandaged from fingers to forearm. But before he could ask him anything about it, the clerk told his boss that he had some very good news. "Guess what, sir?" the clerk burst out in some exciteme...
by Erik_Kowal
Sun Jul 17, 2005 8:18 pm
Forum: No, wait. Don't tell me
Topic: Thanks for the laughs.
Replies: 6
Views: 4462

Thanks for the laughs.

Yes, although there is much about Benny Hill that I still don't understand.
by Erik_Kowal
Sat Jul 16, 2005 8:49 pm
Forum: No, wait. Don't tell me
Topic: A grateful mother
Replies: 0
Views: 2312

A grateful mother

Three sons left home to go out into the wide world, where they prospered. Meeting up again at the wedding of a mutual schoolfriend some years later, they compared notes regarding the gifts each had recently given their elderly mother. The first son said, "I've just finished building Mom a big house ...
by Erik_Kowal
Sat Jul 16, 2005 7:05 am
Forum: No, wait. Don't tell me
Topic: Thanks for the laughs.
Replies: 6
Views: 4462

Thanks for the laughs.

Thanks, Ken. Like you, I am always on the lookout for a good joke or a well-told humorous anecdote, and the ones I have been posting here represent the best of what I've either encountered on the internet or received from other people. Even so, I have rewritten them all in order to make them funnier...
by Erik_Kowal
Sat Jul 16, 2005 5:24 am
Forum: No, wait. Don't tell me
Topic: Going postal
Replies: 0
Views: 2691

Going postal

One morning, a kind-hearted young post office clerk called Helena was sorting through the mail that had been classified as undeliverable that week, and noticed a letter addressed as follows: GOD c/o Heaven Helena opened the envelope, and found herself reading a letter from an old lady who had never ...
by Erik_Kowal
Fri Jul 15, 2005 2:53 am
Forum: No, wait. Don't tell me
Topic: The watermelon farmer
Replies: 0
Views: 2624

The watermelon farmer

A farmer who grew watermelons was doing pretty well. There was only one cloud on his horizon, in the shape of some local kids who regularly sneaked into his watermelon patch at dusk and ate the new fruit as soon as it was ripe. After some intensive thought, the farmer came up with a plan that he fel...
by Erik_Kowal
Thu Jul 14, 2005 9:34 pm
Forum: Word Origins and Meanings
Topic: wetness
Replies: 10
Views: 2756

wetness

Allen, thanks for the correction -- I was not thinking straight regarding CDT vs. UTC. I guess the last word regarding the status of UTC. vs. BST (British Summer Time) for the time stamp will rest with the Forum Admin.
by Erik_Kowal
Thu Jul 14, 2005 8:44 pm
Forum: Word Origins and Meanings
Topic: wetness
Replies: 10
Views: 2756

wetness

Alton, The answer to your second question is that the Wordwizard site is hosted in the United Kingdom, which is six hours ahead of CST (Central Standard Time). The time stamp is always given in GMT (otherwise known as UTC), regardless of the time of year; GMT is constant, and is season-independent. ...
by Erik_Kowal
Thu Jul 14, 2005 12:04 am
Forum: No, wait. Don't tell me
Topic: A problem of logistics
Replies: 1
Views: 2418

A problem of logistics

A biker stopped by the local Harley shop to get his misfiring motorbike repaired. They couldn't fix it while he waited, so he told them that as he didn't live far he would just walk home. On the way back to his house he entered a hardware store and bought a bucket and an anvil. He then stopped off a...